It’s time for another confession; I absolutely loved the Dilbert animated series. For those unaware, in the late 90’s, the iconic newspaper comic strip was made into a series that had a brief television run. I had first found a fondness of the show during my college days in the early 2010’s. Netflix had picked up the rights to stream the show on their platform, as Netflix was starving for retro content back then. On Friday nights, I would head to my best friend’s dorm room, and we’d play Dilbert in the background while we wrote lab reports and worked on calculus problems until the wee hours of the morning.
The show gave more depth to the recurring characters from the newspaper strip; everything from the titular character’s analytical mind and his tendency to call situations as he saw them, to Wally’s complete apathy and laziness, to Dogbert’s psychopathic tendencies and so much more. The show included a lot of deadpan and ironic humor that was relatable. Those that loved Office Space would likely enjoy the Dilbert show. Sadly, the show didn’t survive very long due to factors outside of the creator’s control.
Here’s the thing, the show doesn’t have to stay dead. In case you haven’t noticed, a lot has changed regarding the workplace since the late 1990’s, and there are some topics that Scott Adams could absolutely explore with the depth that a series of 23-minute-long episodes would allow for. It’s also likely that Adams could get the show streaming again, given that Netflix is no stranger to controversy.
One possible topic that Adams could explore is the abundance of temps in the modern workplace. The Bureau of Labor Statistics (BLS) reported that the temporary employment industry doubled in size from 1990 to 2008, thus an episode in which Dilbert has to help a bunch of new temps get up to speed on the Path-E-Tech way could be interesting. The here today, gone tomorrow aspect of temp work can be explored in an episode as well. Maybe a temp engineer makes a minor mistake and Dilbert’s pointy-haired boss reports him to the staffing agency, never to be seen again. A scene in which the pointy-haired boss waits until the last possible second to renew a temp’s contract before expiry could be included as well; the anxiety of the temp really needs to be driven home in order to make that scene work though. Given that temp employees often work without health insurance, a scene in which many of them report to work despite clearly being under the weather could be an angle to explore. After all, we all remember how much Dilbert hates that.
Speaking of illnesses, an episode in which Scott Adams takes on COVID-19 would be interesting to see. This topic has a lot of angles to work from; Dilbert working from home to the dismay of Dogbert is an obvious one. Dilbert’s frustration with Zoom meetings could be another one, as the ever-annoying Loud Howard would still manage to terrorize meetings despite not being physically present. Path-E-Tech’s masking and/or vaccination policy could be ridiculed as well. Dilbert could even leverage being 100% remote as he moves towards nicer weather, no commute, lower cost of living, and not being near Wally’s bad influence all day. Although, a scene in which Dilbert wrestles with ever-increasing feelings of isolation would truly tell both sides of COVID. A meanwhile, back at Path-E-Tech’s office scene could include a water-cooler conversation in which two characters trade equally ridiculous COVID conspiracy theories; everything from intentional Chinese bioweapons to micro-chips and sterilization would be on the table for mockery.
Since I mentioned Zoom in the previous paragraph, Adams could have an absolute field day with the rise of instant communication tools such as Slack, Microsoft Teams and other such apps. These software programs, coupled with the presence of smartphones that simply didn’t exist in the 1990’s, would mean that the pointy-haired boss could pester Dilbert at all hours of the day about minor issues. This would clearly be a relatable topic since France had to ban this practice. Dilbert could start showing signs of mental health erosion as Path-E-Tech unofficially expects all of their employees to be constantly available, thus stamping out any semblance of work-life balance.
Scott Adams could make an episode in which Dilbert, and the rest of Path-E-Tech, have to wrestle with artificial intelligence (AI). The pointy-haired boss rolls out the technology without fully realizing what the tool is capable of (which would be very on-brand for him), and he leaves his group of engineers to figure out how to properly use it. Wally using the AI bot to essentially do his entire job for him, minus one or two menial tasks to ensure his continued employment, would basically be a sub-plot that writes itself! Dilbert would eventually have deep philosophical conversations with the bot much in the same way he would with his garbage man. Upon seeing the bot’s engineering prowess and the depth of its philosophical knowledge, Dilbert could be shown to have a mild breakdown; he is completely outclassed and now fears becoming not only unemployed but having his whole society flipped upside down as a result of AI.
While we’re on the topic of technology, an episode revolving around cybersecurity would be interesting to see. The internet was in its workplace infancy in the 90’s when the original show was made, thus cybersecurity was far less of a concern than it is now. Given that cybercrime is a massive industry now, a 23-minute foray into the topic is possible. Dilbert could walk in on some ignorant Path-E-Tech employees writing passwords on whiteboards or using password123 or any host of horrible security practices. A competitor could exploit this and steal the plans to the GruntMaster 6000 and hence hurt Path-E-Tech’s shareholders! Gasp! Not the shareholders, anybody but the shareholders!
The corporate culture of Path-E-Tech can be an episode in itself. Companies now love to use the abhorrent term “family” to describe their organization and Path-E-Tech would be no different. The pointy-haired boss could be forced by HR to include some mandatory fun exercises that everyone loathes (except Wally, he loves doing anything but work!). The working environment of Path-E-Tech would remain fundamentally unchanged. Alternatively, Path-E-Tech could even become more of a soul-crushing place to work despite the company’s supposed best efforts (i.e. a foosball table in the break room) to avert that. Dilbert could become even more alienated and disillusioned with his life in corporate America, yearning for something better.
“Dan, many of these suggestions really just involve Dilbert’s declining mental health because of his job!” an aware reader will point out. To be fair, they’re absolutely correct. In case you haven’t noticed, we are in a mental health crisis in America. This is doubly painful as there aren’t enough counselors to go around (which could be another episode). “Well Dan, these episodes won’t be funny!” I’ll eventually hear, despite how patently wrong it is. These jokes will land because they are so relatable to millions of people, especially if the tone and delivery from the original 90’s animated series is maintained.
Don’t be afraid to give away your ideas; oak trees don’t sweat about acorns…
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